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- Kelley Armstrong
Atoning
Atoning Read online
Atoning Copyright (c) 2014 by KLA Fricke Inc. All rights reserved.
Cover illustration Copyright (c) 2015 by Maurizio Manzieri. All rights reserved.
Print version interior design Copyright (c) 2015 by Desert Isle Design, LLC.
All rights reserved.
Electronic Edition
ISBN
978-1-59606-729-5
Subterranean Press PO Box 190106
Burton, MI 48513
www.subterraneanpress.com
Prologue - Rae
Rae had failed Chloe once. She wouldn't do it again.
She sat in the hotel room, listening to her mom talk to John Schultz. He was their main contact with "the group." They were talking about Chloe. Schultz had "a man on the inside," as he called him. Someone at Badger Lake feeding him information about the kids being held captive there: Chloe, Simon, Derek and Tori. There were also a bunch of others Rae didn't know--subjects in another Edison Group experiment called Project Phoenix.
Rae had been on the run for almost eighteen months now. Ever since her mother rescued her from the Edison Group, after Rae had...
She swallowed. After she'd betrayed Chloe. She'd thought she was doing the right thing--Dr. Davidoff had convinced her that the Edison Group only wanted to help the kids. She should have seen right through the lie, but after years in foster care, competing for attention with her younger foster siblings--and almost always losing... Well, her mom said that was why Rae had done it. Dr. Davidoff had made her feel special and promised her an amazing life, and she'd fallen for it. She wouldn't make excuses for that. She'd messed up bad. Betrayed the best friend she'd had in years. But she was going to fix that now.
Chloe and the others had been captured by the Nast Cabal. Six months ago, when Sean Nast had tracked down Rae and her mom, he'd seemed like the answer to their prayers. He'd cut a deal with the St. Cloud Cabal to let all the Edison Group kids finally stop running. He would protect them from others, and he'd give them a place to live--Badger Lake, a community custom-made for the kids and their families. They'd get a house. Her mom would have a job. Rae would go to school and, later, to college, all of it paid for by the Nasts. The only catch was that they'd also get special training in hopes that they'd decide to become Cabal employees when they were old enough.
Did it sound too good to be true? Not exactly, and that's why they'd fallen for it. Because, as her mom said, the Nasts knew exactly how to make their offer both enticing and plausible. It was like an athletic company wooing future Olympians by giving them all the training and equipment they need in hopes it will pay off in sponsorship. A business gamble. Perfectly logical. Except it was a lie.
Two weeks before they were due to move to Badger Lake, Schultz and his group of anti-Cabal activists found Rae and her mom and told them the truth. There was no "Badger Lake." Not really. Oh, the place existed, but it was an armed camp. When they arrived, Rae would be put into barracks with the other kids, where she'd be brainwashed and forced to train as a Cabal soldier. As for her mother? Well, they'd tell Rae that Jacinda was fine, but they'd only keep her around for as long as she was useful, for as long as they could force Rae to comply by threatening her mother. In other words, for as long as it took the brainwashing to kick in and for Rae to forget she'd ever had a mother.
Schultz and his group had saved them from the horrors of Badger Lake. Now Rae was going to save Chloe.
"It's all been arranged," Schultz was saying. "The kids sometimes get weekend trips into North Bay as a reward for good behavior. Chloe and a few of the others will be there this weekend."
"Under guard, of course," her mother said.
"Yes, but remember these kids are fully brainwashed. As far as they're concerned, they're happy at Badger Lake, and they have no desire to leave it. There's little chance of them escaping, so they'll only have a few guards, and one of them is our guy. He'll make sure the others are preoccupied when Rae moves in." He turned to Rae. "You understand what you're to do, Rachelle?"
Rae nodded. "Let her catch a glimpse of me and lure her away."
"Right. When we do take her down, she's going to fight. She's going to lie. These kids haven't just been brainwashed--they've been taught CIA-grade techniques for dealing with capture and interrogation. She'll have a complete story fabricated. She'll tell you how wonderful Badger Lake is and that she's living there with her aunt and her dad in a house in their perfect little community, exactly as Sean Nast promised you. She'll lie to get away and maybe even take you with her."
"She won't," Rae said. "I'm going to rescue Chloe, whether she wants it or not."
One - Chloe
I was playing fetch with Derek. Except I was the stick, which can be a little dangerous with a werewolf. That's why we did it--training him so he wouldn't see a fleeing human as dinner. Which can be somewhat disconcerting when playing the role of the fleeing human. We've been doing it for over a year, though, starting slow and working up, and he's never so much as spooked me. They say that werewolves chase by instinct, but Derek doesn't seem to have any of that. Maybe it's the genetic modification; maybe it's just him. The point of the game is simply to reassure him that he's not going to accidentally devour his girlfriend. Which would be inconvenient, especially for that girlfriend.
"Okay, boy," I said, crouching in front of him. "Are you ready?"
He snorted. I don't need to crouch very far to get on his level. I've shot up a couple of inches in the last eighteen months. At sixteen, I'm a whopping five-foot-three. Derek, luckily, seems to have topped out at six-three. With conservation of mass, that still makes him a huge wolf. That's what he looks like, too--a wolf not a wolfman. He's a two-hundred-pound black wolf with green eyes. Those green eyes were currently giving me his best get on with it look.
"Hmm," I said. "I don't know about you, but I'm kind of tired. Maybe you can chase your tail instead."
He growled.
"Or I can throw a stick. As long as you promise to bring it back."
Another growl.
"What's that? I think you're saying that you're tired of playing with me, and you just want to take off on your own and chase squirrels. Speaking of which...squirrel!"
I pointed at one, and he actually took off. I stood there, straining to see what was behind the squirrel, clearly some serious threat because Derek would never run after an actual...
The squirrel saw a giant wolf bearing down, and it ran, and Derek went after it, leaving me staring after him.
"Okay," I murmured. "That's new."
I turned to find a place to sit. There was a fallen log nearby. I was lowering myself onto it when I heard a dry leaf crunch and turned just in time to see a blur of black fur. I tried to scramble out of the way, but I was too slow. He sent me toppling and pinned me on the ground as he loomed over me with his canine equivalent of a grin and a gotcha.
"I really shouldn't have fallen for that," I said with a sigh.
His chuff agreed. He bent down, nuzzling my neck, nose buried in my hair as I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. It's taken time to get to the point where he's this comfortable with me in wolf form. I've been there since his first Change and most since then. It's our thing. Also, it makes a good excuse for being together, away from everyone else. Hey Dad, time for Derek to Change, so we'll be in the forest for a couple of hours and everyone else better stay away, just to be safe. Of course, it doesn't take him two hours to Change and run. The rest of the time is for other forms of recreation, ones that are best enjoyed in total and uninterrupted privacy.
I hugged Derek, running my fingers through his fur. Then, I slid from under him and stood.
"All right," I said. "One last chase. The quicker you catch me, the quicker you can Change back, and then we'll take a nap, because I know you'll b
e exhausted and want to sleep."
He snorted and gave me a look that said, Hell, no.
I grinned. "Well, then, you'd better catch me fast, before you really are too tired for anything but a nap."
I took a look around, staking out the best route. The clearest path wasn't always best--I can outrun Derek a lot faster in thick brush than on open ground. I picked my course, then I took off. No thunder of running paws followed. That was the "fetch" part of this game. He didn't chase me until I gave the signal. I counted steps. Once I got to a hundred, I whistled. That's when I heard the pounding of paws. And that's when I started running for real.
Two
Derek was Changing back. That took about ten minutes, and it didn't seem to get shorter as he grew more accustomed to the process. It was a body changing forms; I guess it couldn't be rushed. It couldn't be painless either, unfortunately. At least the projectile vomiting had stopped. That had been unpleasant. Not that I'd ever said so to him.
I stay with Derek during his Changes. When it gets tough, I rub his shoulders or just talk to him. I don't know if that helps, but he hates to Change without me, so it must at least be some comfort.
He'd finished his Change and was resting, both of us lying on the ground, as he curled up behind me, his arms wrapped around me, heart racing against my back. I'd brought a blanket--two, in fact, one for under us and one for over, to ward off the October chill. Back home, in Buffalo, fall would just be setting in around now. But we didn't live in Buffalo anymore. Didn't live in the United States anymore. We were three hundred miles almost due north in the middle of the Canadian wilderness.
Badger Lake is a private community run by a Cabal. Yes, a Cabal, like the one we'd escaped when I met Derek, and then had spent six months running from. And no, we weren't captives. We were here voluntarily. At least as "voluntarily" as we could be under the circumstances. It was the safest place for us until we were old enough to make serious choices for our futures.
I lay there, listening to Derek's breathing, waiting for it to slow, and, when it did, his hands went to my waist, slipping under my shirt, fingers hot against my bare skin. He nuzzled my neck, which was nice in wolf form but a whole lot nicer in human, as he kissed and nibbled, his hands tight around my waist. I still waited, giving him a few minutes to fully recover. He needs time to get his energy back. Which is one reason we cuddle like this, with my back to him--it's a whole lot easier not to rush when I can't see him and think maybe just a quick... Nope. Better to wait.
He turned me around, one hand under my waist, the other in my hair, bringing me over to him, lips going to his. I remember when we first got together, those sweet and tentative kisses. It wasn't like that anymore. It could be, when we kissed behind the school or our houses, stealing a few moments of privacy when we couldn't hope for more. But when we got this private time in the forest, the kisses were a whole lot different.
In the beginning, as soon as he'd Change back, I'd turn away and wait for him to get dressed. He didn't get dressed anymore--not beyond pulling on his boxers. It had started with an unseasonably hot spell in late spring, when he'd been done Changing and was already overheated, and it seemed perfectly reasonable to postpone the redressing until he caught his breath. Then, he'd catch his breath, and the interruption of getting dressed was just too much. By the end of summer we'd given up any pretense of excuses. If I wasn't in a rush for him to put his clothes back on, he wasn't in a rush to get them on. And I really wasn't in a rush.
That doesn't mean we're in a rush to have sex, though. We'll get there. For now, there are other things we can do as we head in that direction. Lots of other things that keep us plenty entertained on the journey.
We kissed for a while, slow side-by-side kisses and embraces that quickly heated up, turning into deep, hungry, no-holds-barred kissing with Derek on top of me, my legs wrapped around him, his hands under my shirt, unclasping my bra and--
A whistle cut through the forest. Derek's head whipped toward it, his lip curling in a very canine snarl. I chuckled and reached up, my hands in his hair.
"Don't worry," I said. "This is our spot. They'll steer clear."
He continued to scowl in the direction of the whistle. I kissed his chin, my lips moving down his neck as I wriggled under him. He turned from the intruders, kissing me again, fingers undoing my bra. I laid my hand over his.
"Wait," I said. "Let's just make sure they go past."
A low growl. I wriggled some more, teasing him. "Wait...wait..." I murmured while tickling kisses down his neck and onto his shoulder, my hands on his back, running over his bare skin, raising goose bumps. I moved against him, and he groaned softly and--
Another whistle.
"Goddamn it!" he said, his head up, eyes narrowing. "That's Maya, and she knows--"
"Exactly," I said, easing out from under him. "She knows why she shouldn't come here, which is exactly why she's whistling. So she doesn't stumble on us half naked." I glanced down at him. "Or mostly naked."
He grumbled under his breath. I kept looking at him, enjoying the sight before pulling my gaze away with a deep sigh of regret.
"She wouldn't interrupt if she didn't have to," I said. "You know that. Stay here. I'll go see what's up."
Three
We hadn't come to Badger Lake alone. I don't think any Cabal would have wanted us badly enough to pour millions of dollars into a community for me, Derek, Simon and Tori. We're more dangerous than valuable, which was why the St. Cloud Cabal had been so determined to either lock us up or put us down.
It was the Nast Cabal that had us now. Specifically Sean Nast, the CEO's twenty-nine-year-old grandson. While even Derek will grudgingly admit that Sean is as nice a guy as you could imagine for a Cabal sorcerer, Sean isn't a philanthropist. We were here because he hoped to train us and prove that life in a Cabal wouldn't be nearly as terrible as we feared. In other words, he was courting future employees. But while he was interested in the four of us, the ones everyone really wanted were the kids from Salmon Creek, because they aren't just genetically modified supernaturals--they're reintroduced extinct supernatural types.
When I headed through the woods in search of Maya, I found her easily enough, as I usually can when she's with Daniel. They seem to always be talking, with an enthusiasm and an energy that makes me smile. They've been best friends since they were five, yet they never run out of new things to discuss, and that's reassuring. It's what I have with Derek, and it's what I always want to have.
"Table tennis," Maya was saying to him as I approached down a side path.
"Uh-huh," Daniel replied.
"I'm serious. I want a rec center with a table tennis table. We'll tell them it'll help our reflexes. Pinball machines, too. And a pool table. If Sean wants to build super secret agents, we need to develop fast reflexes and superior strategy skills. But we're kids. Easily distracted. Easily bored. So we need table tennis, pinball, pool..."
"And a rec center to hold it all?"
"They can add it to the gym. There's room. I checked."
Daniel chuckled. "Of course you did. I suppose I could argue that pool would help me focus."
"Perfect. Tell them that."
When Maya sets her mind to a thing, she does it--by force of will, if necessary. Put her with Daniel, and there isn't an adult in Badger Lake who won't listen to them and not just in that we're pretending to listen to humor you way. It's an impressive talent to someone who grew up too shy to raise her hand in class. I'm not nearly as insecure as I used to be--and Maya isn't nearly as confident as she seems to be--but it's one more reason we've become friends.
I could see them now, holding hands, still chattering away. Maya's German shepherd Kenjii walked on her other side. Maya will turn seventeen in a week. She's Native American--mostly, at least--a few inches taller than me with long black hair and dark eyes. Daniel is about five-ten, with a boxer's build, blond hair and blue eyes. When we first arrived, Tori had checked him out, but she'd declared that, as cut
e as he was, he wasn't to her tastes. In other words, she'd seen how he looked at Maya and had known she didn't stand a chance.
"Hey," Maya said, turning as she heard my footsteps. "I thought if we talked loud enough, Derek would hear and come barreling over to give us crap for disturbing you two. But I'm guessing he's not dressed yet."
"He just finished Changing back," I said as I gave Kenjii a pat.
"Uh-huh. In the last hour or so, right?"
A year ago, I'd have turned crimson and started stammering. Now I just laughed. Maybe I was growing up. Maybe it's Maya, rubbing off on me. Or maybe it's just learning that being able to talk openly about sex--with both my boyfriend and with a girl friend--makes it easier to navigate what can be really tricky ground. And yes, maybe that's part of the "growing up" thing, too.
"Apologies for the interruption," Daniel said. "We wouldn't do it if we didn't have to."
"Yeah, I know," Derek said, appearing beside me. "So, what's up?"
"If we're going to North Bay, we need to leave"--Daniel checked his watch--"right about now."
"What?" I said.
"Moreno just got word that Sean had to move his visit up to Monday. While we don't necessarily have to be here for that..."
"We have a list of things we want to discuss with him," I said.
"Right. And Maya wants a rec center."
"To hone our skills," she said.
"Through table tennis, pinball, and pool," Daniel said. "Don't ask."
"I wouldn't mind a pinball game," Derek said.
"Then you can ask Sean for that," Maya said. "Tell him it'll help you work off any extra aggression. We'll divvy up the list. So we agree that we want to be back for Sean's visit and that we still want to go to North Bay for the weekend?"
We did. Which meant we had to pack fast.
The town looked deserted. It was, almost. We get monthly trips to Toronto, by helicopter, but after about a year, a few of us started skipping alternate months. Some of the kids chafed at small-town life. Others embraced it. While "embrace" might not be the word to use for Derek, he was certainly happier here, in the middle of our wilderness. Maya was the same--she's a skin-walker, and her dad is a forest ranger, so even small-town living could be a bit too much for her. Like Maya, Daniel is accustomed to living in a village of under two hundred people. Me? I just want to be where my family and friends are, which is here.