Atoning Read online

  They'd brought my dad in a few months ago. We were still getting used to that, after a year apart. To be honest, we'd never been very close--my mom died when I was five, and he'd buried himself in his work, including endless business trips. To come here, he had to take a back seat in his own company, which is tough, but it's what he wants. I'll be off to college soon, and it's important to him to make up for lost time.

  Dad does the monthly trips to Toronto for business. Aunt Lauren was gone too, along with Kit, and Maya's parents and pretty much everyone else in town. The only adults left behind were members of the security team, including Moreno and Antone, who is Maya's biological father. Both would be joining us on our North Bay trip.

  One more person was coming with us: the only other kid who didn't join the Toronto excursion. Maya and I went to talk to him after we had dropped off Derek and Daniel at their respective houses. I'd been staying with Maya while our parents were away, so my stuff was at her place, too.

  When we saw the door to Maya's animal rehab shed open, we headed that way. Kenjii walked to the house porch instead, knowing he wasn't allowed in the shed. We went in and found Ash sitting on a crate, staring at a hutch of young rabbits.

  "If you're hungry, Mom and Dad left a house full of food," Maya said.

  He flipped her the finger and stood, shoving the crate away with his foot. This was Ash. Actually, Ashton, but the only person who calls him that is Tori and just to piss him off. He's Maya's twin brother. They'd been separated as babies and reunited a year ago.

  Anyone who thinks Derek is antisocial has never met Ash. The only thing the twins have in common is a quick tongue. With Ash, though, that tongue can be vicious. Which might explain why Tori is kind of crazy about him.

  Ash saw me and nodded. For him, that was a friendly greeting, far better than the snarl or cold shoulder that most people got.

  "You need to pack," Maya said. "We're leaving ASAP. Sean's coming in Monday."

  "Not going."

  "What?"

  He shrugged. "Changed my mind."

  "But--You... The plan... It was for you. Rent ATVs, do some rock climbing, camp overnight on the escarpment, work on your shifting... It was for you, Ash."

  "Changed my mind," he repeated.

  No one is more patient with Ash than Maya. He hasn't had an easy life. He spent three years on the streets. He has a reason to be prickly. But as she stared at him, I could feel her patience fraying. When she finally said, "All right then," the words came out brittle.

  She turned to walk out. He caught her arm, leaned over and murmured, "Next time, okay? I just...I have stuff to do."

  "What could you--?" She cut herself short and shook her head. "Never mind. I'll talk to Antone."

  "Nah, I'll do it. You go and get ready. Have a good weekend."

  "I'd have a better weekend if--" Again, she stopped herself. "Fine. I'll see you tomorrow night."

  We got about ten feet from the shed when I said, "Oh, I forgot to check on the owl." The injured young eastern screech owl was my first solo patient. Maya nodded, distracted, and headed for the house.

  Ash was still in the shed, now crouched and checking the hinges on the rabbit hutch. He handled construction for Maya's shed, and he was forever fussing with it, worrying it wasn't quite good enough.

  "She's pissed, isn't she?" he said as I walked in.

  "She put a lot of work into planning this weekend. You agreed to come, and she didn't want you feeling like a fifth wheel, so she and Daniel dreamed up this whole aganda to suit you."

  "Fuck." He exhaled and straightened to face me. "I didn't know..." He shook his head and shoved back his hair. "Fuck."

  "Can you just come? Please. It would mean a lot to her."

  "I know, but I can't. I've...got stuff." He lifted his hands. "And, no, I'm not just saying that to skip out. I'm working on something. For Maya. For next week."

  "Her birthday. Well, your birthday, I mean. Both of you."

  "I want to get it done while she's gone. I figured you guys would be okay with me staying back, maybe even be happy not to have me tagging along."

  I gave him a look.

  "Yeah, I know. You'd be okay with me coming. I just thought it wouldn't be a big deal if I bailed. Now it is, and I really want to do this, and Maya's pissed."

  "I'll talk to her."

  "Thanks."

  Four

  Maya's place is tucked into the forest, but it is still close enough to see another house--an empty house, built for Rae and her mother. Sean had tracked them down and convinced them to come to Badger Lake. I'd gone with him to meet her months ago, but they hadn't shown up.

  Sean had worried something had happened, but his spies had caught sight of them a few weeks later. As soon as Sean tried to make contact, Rae and her mother took off again. Apparently, they'd changed their minds. I couldn't blame them--taking refuge with a Cabal seemed crazy. But I wished I'd gotten the chance to talk to Rae myself. I don't know if that would have helped. The last time I'd seen her, she'd refused to leave the St. Cloud laboratory, convinced the Edison Group had our best interests in mind. Once burned, twice shy, I guess. I would still have liked to try.

  North Bay is the biggest city in the area, but it's still almost a two-hour drive, and at fifty thousand people, it's not exactly a major metropolis. It has what we need, though, for a weekend away.

  Maya left Kenjii behind with Ash. Antone stayed, too. So we had Moreno and Luke, one of the security guys. There are a dozen "security guys" at Badger Lake--well, ten guys and two women. They keep to themselves, but I at least try to learn their names, which can be tough when they only stay for three month shifts and don't interact with us much. Luke has been one of the exceptions. At twenty-three, he's the youngest guard we've had, and he's into caving and rock climbing, which we have plenty of around Badger Lake so he's joined us at that a few times. He's careful not to cross the line between guard and friend, but everyone likes him, and we were happy to have him joining us now.

  We'd taken two vehicles. Maya and Daniel were in Daniel's truck. Derek and I were with Moreno and Luke in one of the vans. We could have all fit in the van, but we like the autonomy of having a separate vehicle--we all have our licenses--and to their credit, the Cabal guys are really good about allowing us that autonomy.

  On the way, I did homework. I'm trying to graduate early so I can go to college with Derek. He's a year ahead of me in school. Simon, Maya and Daniel are too, and I'd like us all to go to college together, but mostly, I need to go for Derek. He's made it clear he won't leave without me, and, while he's willing to wait, I don't want that. He's already been taking college-level math and science courses for two years now. He needs more of a challenge.

  We got to the park around five. It was too late for the ATVs, but that plan had really been for Ash. We'd probably stick to hiking and rock climbing. On tonight's agenda was dinner in town, shopping, a movie and then a bonfire. We set up the tents, and the guys took off in the truck to buy campfire wood while Maya and I laid out the duffels and sleeping bags in the tents. Moreno sat on the picnic table and watched us carrying them in.

  "Uh, I think you're doing that wrong," he said as we unzipped the flaps on our respective tents. "Boys on the left, girls on the right."

  "Nope," Maya said and tossed Daniel's sleeping bag and hers into a tent.

  "You're supposed to humor the grown-ups and then swap in the middle of the night."

  "I prefer honesty."

  "Then you won't mind me telling your parents about your arrangement?"

  "Not at all. Of course, you'll have to tell them that you allowed it. Or you'll have to stop us. You could shoot me again. It's been a while."

  Luke laughed as he walked by with his pack.

  Moreno sighed. "You're never going to let me live that down, are you?"

  "Oddly, no."

  He only shook his head. Moreno is a teleporting half-demon and former mercenary. I don't quite know what to make of him. I suspect he
's not a very nice guy, but he's loyal to Antone and committed to his job protecting us, and that's the main thing.

  Maya and Moreno have an...interesting relationship. He chased her and the other Project Phoenix kids through the wilds of Vancouver Island, and she's not kidding when she says he shot at her, but he'd argue he wasn't trying to kill her, and, to him, that's a perfectly valid excuse, and it was completely business, not a reflection on her personally. Yeah, it's a little weird. But he's as devoted to Maya and Ash as he is to their father.

  "Do you want me to make a drugstore run for you, too?" he asked as she hauled in their duffels.

  "If we need that, I'm perfectly capable of getting it myself."

  "Of course you are."

  "And we don't need it," Maya said. We aren't having sex. We're just sleeping together."

  "You realize you aren't actually supposed to tell me that, right?"

  "Did I mention the honesty thing? And now you don't have to worry about telling Antone you let his kid get knocked up. Or telling my dad. I'm not sure which would be worse."

  "Your mom."

  "True. Oh, but we do need you to hit the beer store. We'd like a six pack."

  He sighed.

  "Would you rather I asked for a bottle of vodka and some weed?"

  He shook his head and went to put up his own tent.

  Maya took off to fill the water containers with Moreno. I was sitting on top of the picnic table, studying. I hid my work as soon as I heard the truck coming. My plan to get into college early isn't one I share with Derek. I mentioned the idea once, just an offhand comment, and he kiboshed it. I could have argued, but if I had, then it would have been obvious it had been more than an offhand remark.

  I've asked my tutors to keep my advanced studies a secret, just in case I don't manage it, and I do as much of the work on the sly as I can. Maya knows, and she swears keeping it from Derek is a really bad idea. I tell myself she just doesn't understand, which is crap, but I'm determined to do this for him.

  When the guys returned, I had the study pages stuffed into my novel before Daniel parked.

  "Did everyone abandon you?" Daniel called as he got out.

  "Luke's around. Maya and Moreno are fetching water."

  "That way?" he said, pointing.

  I nodded. He took off at a jog as Derek walked over to me. He glanced at my book. I clasped it shut, better hiding the study pages.

  "How far are you?" he said.

  "Not far." I stuffed it into my jacket pocket.

  "Been working on that one for a while," he said.

  I shrugged. "It's not really grabbing me. I'll find another." I caught the front of his shirt and pulled him into a kiss. "We probably have time for a walk before--"

  His stomach growled.

  "And that answers my question," I said. "We should get everyone moving for dinner."

  He pulled a granola bar from his pocket, opened it and waved to the nearby path. I grinned, hopped down, took his free hand and led him toward the forest.

  Dinner eaten. Shopping list conquered. Time for a movie. That part was for me. While the others enjoy movies, I'm the one who's crazy about them. Or I used to be.

  I guess you'd still say I'm a film buff, but not like I used to be. For one thing, I don't have the opportunity to get out and watch many movies, and we don't get cable at Badger Lake. But to be honest, it's mostly inclination. I used to lose myself in movies to forget the crappier parts of my life, like the constant moving that kept me from making real friends. I don't need that now. My entertainment these days comes more from books--which we can get a lot more easily--and from just getting out and doing stuff. But that doesn't mean I've abandoned that first love, and if we're in a town with a cinema, Derek makes sure I get a movie.

  We were at a repertory house watching Iron Man, which I'd missed when it came out last year. Partway through the film, I ducked out for a bathroom break. Moreno and Luke were in a separate theatre. Moreno said they were seeing some comedy, but Maya swore they ducked into Twilight. She planned to be waiting at the exit with her camera for blackmail fodder.

  I was washing my hands when a girl came into the restroom for a quick check in the full-length mirror behind me. Through my mirror, I caught a glimpse of dark curls. Familiar dark curls. Of course it couldn't be Rae, but I still stepped to the side to get a better angle, see her face and--

  I froze, my hands dripping suds and water as the girl walked out of the restroom. It took three seconds before my legs would work, and then I was bolting out, wiping my hands on my jeans.

  I made it to the foyer just in time to see her walking out the front doors.

  Five

  "Rae!" I called.

  The door had already shut. I went after her, running into the street and looking around frantically. There was no one in sight.

  I knew I'd seen Rae, beyond any doubt. The question was: had I really seen her...or her ghost? At the thought, my stomach clenched so hard that I nearly doubled over.

  I forced myself to replay exactly what I'd seen. Rae's reflection in the mirror. Did necromancers see the reflection of ghosts? Honestly, I'd never had reason to notice.

  I hadn't seen Rae open the door as she left, though, that was because it was around the corner. Nor had I seen her open the one to leave the theater. Yet I had seen it open. That was undeniable. I had watched her walk through an open door and seen it close behind her. She wasn't a ghost.

  I took out my cell phone. In Badger Lake, they work on a private network, but out here, we have full access. I'm sure they track our calls, but it still gives us some sense, again, of autonomy. We weren't captives or prisoners. If we really wanted to, we could call for help before the Cabal could intervene.

  I rang Derek. Or I tried, but no answer suggested cell service was blocked for moviegoers.

  I was trying again when the door opened and Derek stepped out.

  "Was I gone five seconds too long?" I said.

  "Yeah, sorry."

  Speaking of autonomy...Derek knows I need my space, but giving me that can be a struggle for him. There's a fine line between watching out for your girlfriend and making her feel she can't watch out for herself. It's particularly hard with a wolf's instinct to protect.

  "Well, in this one case, I appreciate it." I lifted the phone. "I was trying to call you. I just saw..."

  As I remembered what I'd seen, my smile of welcome evaporated. Derek strode over. "What's wrong?"

  I told him.

  "That's..." he began.

  "Extremely statistically unlikely?" I said. "The probability that I'd randomly run into Rachelle in a North Bay movie theater?"

  "Yeah."

  "I know it's a trap. Which is why I didn't take off after her myself. Someone's gotten to her and is forcing her to lure me away. So I need you to go back inside."

  "And get Moreno?" He shook his head. "Whoever set this up knows our plans. Meaning there's a leak and--"

  "I know that. I also know that the more people we bring into this, the greater chance we have of losing Rae. Same goes if we stand out here discussing it. I want you to go back inside and out a rear exit. Wait until I take off after her--presuming she'll try again--and then follow us."

  "To do what?"

  "Rescue Rae, of course."

  He rubbed his mouth.

  "Yes, she betrayed us," I said. "Me, especially, and for that, you didn't even want her in Badger Lake. If she did come back, you didn't want me to have anything to do with her. We argued about it enough that I could hardly forget. But I'm going after her, Derek. Either you help or you go watch the movie."

  He gave me a look.

  "As much as you don't like Rae, there's a difference between ignoring her when she's safe in Badger Lake and ignoring her when she could be in real danger. You're not going to stop me, and you're not going to make me handle this alone, so just register your disapproval, and let me go after her."

  "It's serious disapproval."

  "Noted." I
lifted up and kissed him. "And I'm sorry. Mostly. But I'm going to give you the chance to tell me off, as loudly as you can, and then I'm going to run away, and you're going to storm back inside and pretend you've left me to chase a figment of my imagination. In three, two, one... Go."

  While I've never dreamed of being an actor--I'd rather be behind the camera--years of drama class means I'm pretty good at it. Six months on the run, playing roles every day, had helped. Derek has zero natural talent and almost as little inclination to learn, but he did a good job of it that night, probably because he really did think I was making a big mistake, so chewing me out for it came easily.

  After our fake fight, I raced down the street and ducked around a building, "hiding" in case Derek came after me. Then, I called Liz. I didn't need a cell phone for that. My former roommate from Lyle House, Liz died a day after I arrived. When I contact her, I'm summoning her spirit.

  In the beginning, ghost-Liz was like a friend who lived next door. Give her a shout and there she was. Now it's as if she's in another country, and sometimes I just can't get in touch with her. We haven't grown apart--the distance is actually a good thing, because it means she's crossed over into the afterlife. That's what I had wanted for her. It just took her a long time to want the same thing, to accept she couldn't hang out in our world and pretend nothing had happened. My necromancer powers are strong enough that I can pull her back, but it's like making an overseas call on a bad phone line. Sometimes it works; sometimes it doesn't. Tonight, when I hoped for her help scouting, no one answered.

  After about five minutes, I saw Rae walking along the road, as if there were nothing odd about a sixteen-year-old girl aimlessly wandering an empty street on a Friday night. I backed down the side street. Then, I came running out onto the main one, panting as hard as Rae would remember me panting when we'd escaped Lyle House together. I won't say I'm in amazing shape now, but between playing fetch with Derek and keeping up with Maya, I get a lot more physical activity than I used to. I faked it for Rae, though, heaving like I was about to hack up a lung.